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Children's books have been an essential part of childhood for generations, providing entertainment, education, and moral lessons to young readers. While some people believe that certain topics should be avoided in children's literature, I believe that there is no topic that should be off-limits in children's books. Rather, it is necessary to choose an age-appropriate way to discuss the topic, no matter how hard. As renowned children's book author Maurice Sendak once said, "Children are tough, though we tend to think of them as fragile. They have to be tough. Childhood is not easy. We sentimentalize children, but they know what's real and what's not. They understand metaphors and symbols. If children are different from us, they are more spontaneous. Grown-up lives have become overlaid with dross."
Book Banning is Harmful:
When people hear about hard topics, there is often a desire to shelter the child from those things. At its heart, it's where I think censorship comes from. In reality, it is telling children that they do not have the right to know about the things that are, whether we like it or not, happening to them. Death, violence, pain, illness, abuse, bullying, sex, prejudice, and mental health are part of many children's lives. Even the most idyllic childhood may include at least one of those things. I myself had to deal with the death of several grandparents, bullying, and illness despite being raised in a very loving home. The problem with such rhetoric is that it has made many writers afraid to write about anything that may be seen as controversial.
As noted by award-winning author Judy Blume, "It's not just the books under fire now that worry me. It is the books that will never be written. The books that will never be read. And all due to the fear of censorship. As always, young readers will be the real losers." Banning books deprives children of the opportunity to engage with challenging topics and learn to think critically. Obviously, a young adult book where the main character is trying to decide if they should have sex or not, as in Judy Blume's "Forever", isn't for a ten-year-old. But it would be perfectly appropriate for a fifteen-year-old. Maybe not your fifteen-year-old, you think. Okay. And? Does that mean that we shouldn't have books about hard topics because we don't want our children to be aware of the concept?
If you have been watching the news, you will know that there are several states in the US that have decided that hot-button topics are too problematic. It isn't enough that a parent would stop their child from reading a certain book. They want ALL children to lose access and, if they had it their way, to make it so the books don't exist. To keep them from being written and published in the first place. Rather than acknowledge that some children do deal with difficult things in life, they would rather keep children in ignorance of things like sex, divorce, violence, death, illness, prejudice, bullying, and more in order to maintain the illusion of naivety.
Age-Appropriate Topics:
While no topic should be off-limits in children's books, it is crucial to consider the age-appropriateness of the material. Young children may not have the emotional or cognitive capacity to process certain topics, such as death or violence. However, as children grow and develop, they can handle more complex and challenging material. So how do we deal with these hard-hitting topics for each age level? Let's take a look at the topic of divorce. While no parent wants to need a book on this topic, the truth is, some kids DO needs books about it. Here's a breakdown of ways that a writer might handle the topic for different age groups:
Age 2-5
Discuss divorce in simple terms, using language and concepts that young children can understand (e.g. "Mommy and Daddy won't be living in the same house anymore")
Focus on the child's feelings and reassure them that they are loved and not to blame
Book example: "Two Homes" by Claire Masurel
III. Age 6-10
Discuss divorce in slightly more complex terms, acknowledging the changes that will happen (e.g. living in two separate households, two bedrooms, different rules)
Encourage the child to express their feelings and ask questions
Address common concerns and worries that children may have about divorce (e.g. where they will live, how often they will see each parent, what school they will go to)
Book example: "The Seventh Wish" by Kate Messner
IV. Age 11-14
Discuss divorce in more detail, acknowledging the emotional impact it can have on a child
Encourage the child to express their feelings and concerns and validate their experiences
Give the child a voice and let them convey their wishes
Address more complex issues related to divorce, such as custody arrangements and conflict between parents
Book example:"The Divorce Express" by Paula Danziger
V. Age 15-18
Discuss divorce as a more mature topic that may require a deeper understanding of relationships and family dynamics
Encourage the reader to think critically about the impact of divorce on individuals and families
Address more complex issues related to divorce, such as legal and financial implications
Book example:"Untwine" by Edwidge Danticat
Children's Self-Regulation:
When I was 14, I picked up a copy of Orson Scott Card's "Memories of Earth." I was a voracious reader and had read most of the young adult books at my library by that point. Moving to adult books, I came across my very first sex scene. I was raised in a very conservative Christian home. Other than a basic birds and bees talk, I knew very little about sex. So this scene came as a bit of a shock. After making it a few paragraphs in, I closed the book and told myself that I wasn't ready for that yet. I ended up going back to the children's books and reading some of the younger children's series that I had missed because I didn't start reading a lot until I was 12. Books like Nancy Drew, Babysitter's Club, and American Girl. By the time I read through those books, I was a little older and a little more mature, and I wasn't so shocked by a sex scene.
Research has shown that children are capable of self-regulating their reading material. A study by the American Library Association found that children tend to choose books that match their cognitive and emotional maturity level, even when presented with a range of options. This indicates that children are capable of making age-appropriate choices when it comes to reading material. As Jacqueline Woodson, author of "Brown Girl Dreaming" said, "The beauty of reading is that children have the power to choose what they want to read, and they have the power to put a book down if it's not right for them at that moment."
Parents worry so much about their children reading something they aren't ready for or something that is too hard or complex for them, but my experience has been that it is the parent who is grossly underestimating their child. It is also important to remind ourselves that children don't stay children. Children become adults. Children who aren't allowed or even presented with books about hard topics often become ignorant adults.
Controversy:
If you have decided to write on a hot-button issue, you should be warned...it will be controversial. Someone, somewhere, is going to decide that your book about cancer, divorce, racism, sexuality, or bullying is problematic. Someone will ban it. Some of the most benign books have been banned simply for having illustrations that show children of ethnicities other than white. (I wish I was kidding) This does not mean that you shouldn't write about these topics. It means that you should be fully aware of what you are getting yourself into.
There are so many wonderful books out there that have been banned. In many cases, the banning actually helps book sales. But there also comes with it harassment from those who think they are doing good by removing books. Be sure that the book you are writing is something that truly means something to you and is a book you are willing to fight for.
In conclusion, there is no topic that should be off-limits in children's books, but rather a need to choose an age-appropriate way to address challenging topics.
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